Motherhood...

Here's another long one... sorry! This began as a letter to a friend, and I decided I thought it might be worth something to you young moms out there that blog-hop! By the way, this morning's message (Every Woman's Grace)was from Logan Carr. I highly recommend you listen to her if you haven't already! She is high energy, and all out striving after the Lord. And she's hilarious. I laughed, I cried (and yes, it was better than "Cats"... I fell asleep watching "Cats" in London!! Seriously!). And I learned a lot. Anyway, here's the letter.

Dear Shineequa (not her real name),

I have been thinking about you so much recently, and especially this morning when I was at Bible Study. Let me tell you why, and then maybe you can see if it connects at all to your current sentiment about parenting! This morning's talk (at Every Woman's Grace) was titled, "Submission and Sovereignty". Oddly enough, her intro related so much to what I've been thinking about, and am wondering if it isn't at least part of your struggle. Our culture is so inundated with feminism, and tragically, we don't even notice it. Her point was that we (women) have been trained without our even knowing it, that we have to stand up and fight for our rights to be equal with men, to be heard, to be seen, respected, etc.- not for our femininity, but rather for something else (equality of some sort?? I'm not sure).

Sadly, the message has permeated the church as well. The priority of family has really diminished as a result, and the role of women has been changed- though not in the Bible! In fact, the woman who spoke was an avid feminist before she came to Christ. She also noted that the beginning of the feminist movement documents their own purpose which includes outright ignoring the Bible/despising it and what it says about women and the role of a woman, because it contradicts the ideas of the movement. As a result of the movement, the ideas have spread far and wide. Even the church has been affected by the sentiments. Unknowingly, we have adopted partially- if not wholly, this garbage from the world. I think this message must affect women who stay at home to raise their family- to some degree or another. We are fed the lie from the world that this "parenting stage" is just a phase to get through until we can get back to "our life". We push through this difficult time of having little ones, only so that we can move on with life and get back to what we used to do, and what used to define us.

"WHAT IN THE WORLD?!???!?!!" This is what defines me!!! This is who I am!! Once we become moms, this is what defines us, and we should be proud of it (not sinfully proud ;). I am just so angry that the world is tearing down our families, and their lies have reached into the church. Can I remind you (and me!!) of what God has to say about mothering and having little ones? From Titus 2:3-5, God clearly wants women to be trained in loving their husbands and their children, self-controlled and pure, busy at home, kind, and subject to their husbands. "Oh, but that sounds so old-fashioned". Does it? This is the Word of God!! We have to remember this, and prize what it tells us to be, over and above- NO!- rather than what the world tell us. The world tells us that we won't be fulfilled unless we "find ourselves" and fulfill our (selfish) goals and dreams (LIE). If our goals and dreams align with God's Word, then I agree with the world. But the problem is that the world has fed us the lie that supporting our husbands, and simply raising a family (godly or not) isn't a real or legitimate goal. That is the garbage of the world. The Biggest LIE. That is what we are fed, and so often buy into. Don't give in! Don't believe it! Believe what the Bible tells you!

Let's look at the famous passage extolling the characteristics of the godly woman in Proverbs 31. First, look at verses 10 and 11. "A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value." How I want to be this! I want to be worth more than rubies! I want my husband to have full confidence in me and for him to lack nothing of value because he has me- this couldn't be more fulfilling! Nothing means more to me than for the person I love the most to have "full confidence" in me. Would I be as fulfilled if "my boss" (if I had one) had "full confidence" in me? Not nearly. My husband's confidence in me is much more "fulfilling" and "empowering" to me (using Oprah terms) than any praise I could receive from anyone else (except for the Lord). Moving on.

Look at Proverbs 31:25-31. "She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue. She watches over the affairs of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: 'Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.' Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate." What a beautiful picture! Are you inspired? Strength and dignity are not found in a pants suit with stilettos. They are not found in cashing a hearty paycheck after picking up the kids from daycare. Strength and dignity aren't even found in earning a promotion in front of your coworkers.

At the end of the day, (or at the end of your life), would you be pleased and fulfilled if your boss stood by your bedside telling you what a hard worker you were? What an asset you were to the company? Or would you prefer your husband and children to be there extolling your virtue as a wife and mom? Your husband extolling the nobility of the support you gave him enabling him to lead your home, be the provider, and your children lovingly speaking of the way that you loved them and wisely instructed them? Of how you diligently cared for the matters of the home and took such good care of them? Of how you prepared them for life by your example and teaching? I'm pretty sure we'd all agree on that one.

I'm encouraged myself and energized to do my "job" with excellence! As Christian women, we need to love what we do, and do it with joy to the Lord! He has given us a much more fulfilling and amazing job than the V.P. of any company. Remember this! We have the task and challenge to raise our kids, being dignified and noble in the process, receiving praise from our husband and children, and pleasing the Lord in it all. We need to have the correct (BIBLICAL)view of our job as wife and mom, or I think we will be continually frustrated and confused by the messages that the world sends our way. We need to have a clear picture of what our role is according to the Word of God. If we take our cues from the world, we will search for fulfillment and constantly be disappointed. If we live in accordance with God's Word, believing all of what it says about women, I believe we will find the truest joy and the richest blessing of fulfillment as we press on!