Cat Fight

Today I experienced a cat fight in my own home that is worth blogging about. Since I have four girls, let me clear the misconception that I may be talking about something between them. This was an actual kitty cat fight complete with fur flying. A little background... we have had cats since Kurt and I were married 10 years ago, and currently had just one. So when a friend mentioned that she knew of a sweet kitten that needed a home, I thought (errantly), "oh, a little kitty friend for our sweet Lexi!" The thought was so sweet- two little kitties sleeping intertwined at the foot of our children's bed... playfully batting at each other, licking each other, snuggling on the couch... Well, we brought Chester home with high hopes and happy kids. We thought we'd let him get used to the kids first, then introduce him to his lifetime playmate and friend, Lexi. Two rocky days with the kids passed- he wasn't fond of them, but seemed to be getting used to the commotion. He only scratched them twice, and probably because they startled him. So I figured we should introduce the cats. Well, the usual staring and casual hissing went on in front of me for a few minutes, and when they had had enough, back to the room Chester went. A couple of more days passed, and I thought I'd give it another try. That was this morning. So I brought Lexi in, and immediately she saw Chester, and her eyes fixated on him with some sort of fright. When I put her down on the floor 7 feet away from him, Chester turned his head toward her and something went off in his brain. (something like, "I AM THE ONLY CAT IN THIS WORLD!! I HATE ALL OTHER CATS!! ESPECIALLY THIS ONE!!") Thus began the chase. Chester, with every fiber of his being, determined that he was going to eat little Lexi alive. He ran after her into the kitchen, where he tackled her into the cupboards with a crash. They tumbled for all of 1.2 seconds hissing and growling, until Lexi got out of his grip and took off running across the dining room floor, directly toward me. At full speed, I literally could not move out of the way, nor was she attempting to run around me. I took one step to open my legs, and she ran right through, Chester 1/4 of a second behind, running through my legs as well. Meanwhile, the sweet little girls were in the kitchen eating breakfast. Hearing the ruckus, wild, craziness, and seeing a glimpse of it when the fight had crashed into the kitchen cupboards, the girls were all starting up in a panicked crying fest. Kinley climbed up on top of the kitchen table, crying and panicking. Camdyn was frozen at the little kid table, crying, and Macy was sobbing in her high chair. What in the world was I going to do?? They had crashed into the wall in the living room and were intertwined and brawling. All I could think of was, "throw something at them to break it up!" I looked around, and all that was feasible was a picture frame on the living room table, or the phone in my hand. I chose the phone. I didn't necessarily want to hit them, but I chucked it in their direction. That didn't stop them. I don't think either of them even noticed. I proceeded to clap my hands over them, screaming at the top of my lungs trying to startle them... They took off again and Lexi ran into the kitchen, with Chester right behind. She jumped up on a kitchen chair by the back door, and Chester was ready to pounce again. I quickly opened the back door, and Lexi ran out. I slammed the door right as Chester was about to make the escape.... HOORAY! I triumphantly grabbed Chester by the back of the neck (after he almost attacked my hand in his fury), scolding him on the way to the bathroom (to lock him up for life) for his misbehavior. He literally had a chunk of Lexi's hair in his mouth. Then I came back into the kitchen to console the little ones. All of our heart rates were racing at this point. After the consoling was done, I got on the phone to call the original owner of the kitty to let her know that Chester "wasn't a good fit for our family"...Anyone want a cat??